FilipeTheMessenger was attacked

I was attacked

My children and friends saw me limping, not being able to move, having excruciating pains associated with the infections of the blows I suffered in the face, and other problems associated with not being able to pursue a normal diet.

It has been twenty days since the attack, and I am still suffering from the effects of that minute of nonsense blind savagery. I still have two infections, and my chest still tells me to stop overdoing certain things that, in normal conditions, I would be able to do.

I do not keep dates; I do not want anything in this page that can be linked with that fatidic day, and that person. However, this long essay is my way to rollover this page, and this life at this very moment.

It coincided with the week of my birthday. This was the only reason I could not hide what happened. In a surprise party organised by my children, I was caught unaware, and in the end, I had to explain why I could not move, or eat, or laugh.

I also had to take many days of sick and annual leave.

For the above reasons, I have to write my stance about all that happened.

Socially, Individually

I fulfilled my duties as an individual, as a person, as a citizen, by complaining about the aggression and assault to the police.

Legally

Since the day I wrote my statement at the police station, my complaint has been quashed. I was verbally informed that my statement was not "safe", that it was not possible to prove its veracity because it was cancelled by the other part refutations, and that, in the "public interest", the case would not go ahead.

Politically

The meaning for me is that it was expensive to pursue the case.

Other cases, i.e. someone calling another one a "leprechaun", not far from "duende" or "minotauro", etc, was taken to prosecution as a racist act. Some common sense prevailed after.

Before, a Council fined a grand mother for something her grandson, still in a pram, did. The not yet toddler threw a bit of a potato chip, biodegradable I believe, to the pavement. She was fined Ł80.

Only strange cases like these come to fore and are used by newspapers for the amazement of people and circulation. The other ones are usually about celebrities' demeanours, whatever they did or not, and some exalted cases or stories newspapers feed the people until no more.

Why this mixture of things? It is simple! Politically, if the guy had killed me, I would have finally won some political rights (priority), otherwise not. So, as we say in my mother tongue, "there is not so long to the sky, not so long to the ground". Balance. A proper look to the crime scene would have immediately shown the contradictions of the other person involved.

The police resources are stretched, but when you are a victim of violence, you expect legality and justice.

Logically

Von Newman would be happy with the statement that follows.

It is a case of "A Truth against an opposite Truth that makes them a Lie".

Expensive!

Justice

My Alter Ego

From the moment I knew I had to fight back to escape from the confined space, as large as my shoulders, with no way out, any way to escape, I resolved my inner resistance against violence.

My Ego

I feel vindicated. After having been caught off-guard, sent to the floor, blind, confined between two walls and a cage, I was able to stand up while receiving kicks and punches in my face, head, and chest. Finally standing, I looked to the aggressor, eyes in the eyes (did he shivered at that juncture?), stopped his continuous attacks, and, finally, forced him to retreat.

Morals

Right or Wrong, based on what?

As things are, see the logical side, I cannot allow anyone to decide of the veracity of the facts, or to decide who is right or wrong. If the law is not able to prove it, then no one else should be. See "Financial" sub-title.

Principles

Principles and morals can be associated with ideas, set of ideas, structured or not, written or not, etc.

I like to follow the law. I believe laws are the result of the accumulation of human experience, and if everybody had this innate way of learning laws, by following them, life could be FUN only. But no, alas, children have to be educated (see changed in behaviour) and who performs the education, who creates this violent culture we all live in these days, etc?

I used to live all my life in Africa, where enforcement of state laws and administration rarely reached the majority of people. I learned about cultures where one person that killed someone else could be set as not guilty, instead, someone else, i.e. a cousin, an uncle, etc, named by someone else, could go down as the culprit. This one, disgraceful luck, could be then killed. The thought of random power of death prevails and commands the peaceful days, but when things go wrong, millions die in hours. A thesis for a PHD!

Principles are different. Any assurance disappears as soon as truth emerges. My principles about how people should lead their lives are vague, but I strongly support life.

We both are alive, good!

However, the theory of chaos well said, can bring flapping butterflies in another generation of our humanity. Probably, we will be one day swarmed by potential 'Ghandis'.

Ethics

Again, but Ethics with morals or without morals!

The rule of law can be primed to a point where morals are ditched completely. We live in times when ex-jailed-corrupted-ministers are interviewed by the TV as victims, and getting jobs based on their experience while in jail. No luck for Lucky Luke!

Former burglars have a TV job showing all other potential burglars how to burglar a place (in the name of helping people to make their places safe). The occasion makes the burglar! Let them not having many pre-skills, ok?

Too much boxing around to control the "inner city ganglands". More skills!

Ethics with morals. Is this better, one having self-regulatory believes, judging or not judging others, believing we are better or not than all these "others"?

"The attacker lost his mind"! This is my statement and my stance, I am giving him the benefit of the doubt. I expect he does not lose his mind again. He will not have any other one like me around.

Aesthetics

My face was funny.

After a good number of kicks and punches I stopped the attack - with one punch ONLY- and my preoccupation was not to use the one hand that writes and paints. I did that. What an achievement, being able to worry about such a detail at that moment?

Past experiences

Thirty years ago another person tried to attack me. I had more space and I could neutralise the "racist" before he could do anything. A friend came and stopped his attack. I had my arms crossed talking to my friend when the "coward" attacked again and punched my face. With my eyes closed, I punched back. Next day, I saw my friend with a big "black" eye. "What happened?" I asked. "Don't you remember? You punched me instead the other guy!"

Well, I am not very convinced that is all right to punch friends instead of foes. Better not to do it against anyone.

Financial

Time is money. I have already wasted 20 days in pain, and more to come, maybe. I had to take sick days and days leave. I cannot afford to jade myself "ad limits" onto another person when my objective is peace.

A civil case could be a solution for all the pain and justice, morals and ethics, etc. I cannot afford it. I also do not agree with any gain from anyone, private or public, associated with the aggressor. He was outside his working place; I was as well.

Fiction

I will create a small film based on this attack. A visual narrative about anything can only move minds and hearts but never be associated with the understanding of Truth. People will take sides, as children do when they play "cow-boys" and "Injuns".

If that happens with the film I have started already, it will add to the debate.

My childhood choice was to be an "injun", always on the fair side. Those games were not PC ones, but many games like those build good characters. The idea that people cannot see through what's behind them is for me more non-PC than playing the non-PC game. Key word, GAME. Yes, games are essential to build character.

Did the attacker play games?

…finally, more words to prove that life has some meaning.

Physiologically

Kicked off-guard in my testicles, I went down, blind, squeezed, confined, paralysed by the surprise assault. I kept feeling the blows in my chest, head, face. Many! Then I started standing up, rubbing my back against the wall, and still receiving blows. Only when I grabbed him in his sleeveless bright blue t-shirt(?) or his neck(?) and I kept him far, his blows stopped reaching me. So, why could I have received so many blows and still stopping the criminal assault? Adrenaline is a powerful drug, it stopped my pain, and it allowed my brain, still clear, still working, to concentrate my reactions to stand up and stop him. My heartbeat was firm, my nerves in place, my brain waves were being controlled by this automatic innate reactions of a small gland that controls fear and survival.

A cornered cat is never a tamed cat. The assailant knew that at the moment he was overpowered. He run away. Cowardly? Probably not! His own gland that controls fear took over so off he went and he could survive as well.

Philosophically

No angst as in Kierkegaard; no antagonism leveling as in Hegel; no rationalisation, justification as in F.Hacker; no guilty feelings from some childhood catechism; no elevation through pain as in F. Nietzsche; no critical loss of senses as in Kant; no soothing path as in the Sidharta walks; no pleasure as in Hedon; no truth, no sophisms as before and after Epicure; not even the satisfaction of being 'macho' as in pubs I never go; no self-reliance as in S.Mill; no living in the moment as J.P.Sartre; no libertarian as in S. de Beauvoir, or happy not to follow the Talon laws, or not to be sure as in B.Russel; no looking down as in any middle class educated person. Silence as power: probably I did that, and was this the reason of the attack that caught me completely off-guard?

And I could go forever… my favourite being 'L'Homme Dominé' by Albert Memi.

I will never know.


	FilipeTheMessenger was attacked I was attacked My children and friends saw me limping, not being able to move, having excruciating pains associated with the infections of the blows I suffered in the face, and other problems associated with not being able to pursue a normal diet. It has been twenty days since the attack, and I am still suffering from the effects of that minute of nonsense blind savagery. I still have two infections, and my chest still tells me to stop overdoing certain things that, in normal conditions, I would be able to do. I do not keep dates; I do not want anything in this page that can be linked with that fatidic day, and that person. However, this long essay is my way to rollover this page, and this life at this very moment. It coincided with the week of my birthday. This was the only reason I could not hide what happened. In a surprise party organised by my children, I was caught unaware, and in the end, I had to explain why I could not move, or eat, or laugh. I also had to take many days of sick and annual leave. For the above reasons, I have to write my stance about all that happened. Socially, Individually I fulfilled my duties as an individual, as a person, as a citizen, by complaining about the aggression and assault to the police. Legally Since the day I wrote my statement at the police station, my complaint has been quashed. I was verbally informed that my statement was not "safe", that it was not possible to prove its veracity because it was cancelled by the other part refutations, and that, in the "public interest", the case would not go ahead. Politically The meaning for me is that it was expensive to pursue the case. Other cases, i.e. someone calling another one a "leprechaun", not far from "duende" or "minotauro", etc, was taken to prosecution as a racist act. Some common sense prevailed after. Before, a Council fined a grand mother for something her grandson, still in a pram, did. The not yet toddler threw a bit of a potato chip, biodegradable I believe, to the pavement. She was fined Ł80. Only strange cases like these come to fore and are used by newspapers for the amazement of people and circulation. The other ones are usually about celebrities' demeanours, whatever they did or not, and some exalted cases or stories newspapers feed the people until no more. Why this mixture of things? It is simple! Politically, if the guy had killed me, I would have finally won some political rights (priority), otherwise not. So, as we say in my mother tongue, "there is not so long to the sky, not so long to the ground". Balance. A proper look to the crime scene would have immediately shown the contradictions of the other person involved. The police resources are stretched, but when you are a victim of violence, you expect legality and justice. Logically Von Newman would be happy with the statement that follows. It is a case of "A Truth against an opposite Truth that makes them a Lie". Expensive! Justice My Alter Ego From the moment I knew I had to fight back to escape from the confined space, as large as my shoulders, with no way out, any way to escape, I resolved my inner resistance against violence. My Ego I feel vindicated. After having been caught off-guard, sent to the floor, blind, confined between two walls and a cage, I was able to stand up while receiving kicks and punches in my face, head, and chest. Finally standing, I looked to the aggressor, eyes in the eyes (did he shivered at that juncture?), stopped his continuous attacks, and, finally, forced him to retreat. Morals Right or Wrong, based on what? As things are, see the logical side, I cannot allow anyone to decide of the veracity of the facts, or to decide who is right or wrong. If the law is not able to prove it, then no one else should be. See "Financial" sub-title. Principles Principles and morals can be associated with ideas, set of ideas, structured or not, written or not, etc. I like to follow the law. I believe laws are the result of the accumulation of human experience, and if everybody had this innate way of learning laws, by following them, life could be FUN only. But no, alas, children have to be educated (see changed in behaviour) and who performs the education, who creates this violent culture we all live in these days, etc? I used to live all my life in Africa, where enforcement of state laws and administration rarely reached the majority of people. I learned about cultures where one person that killed someone else could be set as not guilty, instead, someone else, i.e. a cousin, an uncle, etc, named by someone else, could go down as the culprit. This one, disgraceful luck, could be then killed. The thought of random power of death prevails and commands the peaceful days, but when things go wrong, millions die in hours. A thesis for a PHD! Principles are different. Any assurance disappears as soon as truth emerges. My principles about how people should lead their lives are vague, but I strongly support life. We both are alive, good! However, the theory of chaos well said, can bring flapping butterflies in another generation of our humanity. Probably, we will be one day swarmed by potential 'Ghandis'. Ethics Again, but Ethics with morals or without morals! The rule of law can be primed to a point where morals are ditched completely. We live in times when ex-jailed-corrupted-ministers are interviewed by the TV as victims, and getting jobs based on their experience while in jail. No luck for Lucky Luke! Former burglars have a TV job showing all other potential burglars how to burglar a place (in the name of helping people to make their places safe). The occasion makes the burglar! Let them not having many pre-skills, ok? Too much boxing around to control the "inner city ganglands". More skills! Ethics with morals. Is this better, one having self-regulatory believes, judging or not judging others, believing we are better or not than all these "others"? "The attacker lost his mind"! This is my statement and my stance, I am giving him the benefit of the doubt. I expect he does not lose his mind again. He will not have any other one like me around. Aesthetics My face was funny. After a good number of kicks and punches I stopped the attack - with one punch ONLY- and my preoccupation was not to use the one hand that writes and paints. I did that. What an achievement, being able to worry about such a detail at that moment? Past experiences Thirty years ago another person tried to attack me. I had more space and I could neutralise the "racist" before he could do anything. A friend came and stopped his attack. I had my arms crossed talking to my friend when the "coward" attacked again and punched my face. With my eyes closed, I punched back. Next day, I saw my friend with a big "black" eye. "What happened?" I asked. "Don't you remember? You punched me instead the other guy!" Well, I am not very convinced that is all right to punch friends instead of foes. Better not to do it against anyone. Financial Time is money. I have already wasted 20 days in pain, and more to come, maybe. I had to take sick days and days leave. I cannot afford to jade myself "ad limits" onto another person when my objective is peace. A civil case could be a solution for all the pain and justice, morals and ethics, etc. I cannot afford it. I also do not agree with any gain from anyone, private or public, associated with the aggressor. He was outside his working place; I was as well. Fiction I will create a small film based on this attack. A visual narrative about anything can only move minds and hearts but never be associated with the understanding of Truth. People will take sides, as children do when they play "cow-boys" and "Injuns". If that happens with the film I have started already, it will add to the debate. My childhood choice was to be an "injun", always on the fair side. Those games were not PC ones, but many games like those build good characters. The idea that people cannot see through what's behind them is for me more non-PC than playing the non-PC game. Key word, GAME. Yes, games are essential to build character. Did the attacker play games? …finally, more words to prove that life has some meaning. Physiologically Kicked off-guard in my testicles, I went down, blind, squeezed, confined, paralysed by the surprise assault. I kept feeling the blows in my chest, head, face. Many! Then I started standing up, rubbing my back against the wall, and still receiving blows. Only when I grabbed him in his sleeveless bright blue t-shirt(?) or his neck(?) and I kept him far, his blows stopped reaching me. So, why could I have received so many blows and still stopping the criminal assault? Adrenaline is a powerful drug, it stopped my pain, and it allowed my brain, still clear, still working, to concentrate my reactions to stand up and stop him. My heartbeat was firm, my nerves in place, my brain waves were being controlled by this automatic innate reactions of a small gland that controls fear and survival. A cornered cat is never a tamed cat. The assailant knew that at the moment he was overpowered. He run away. Cowardly? Probably not! His own gland that controls fear took over so off he went and he could survive as well. Philosophically No angst as in Kierkegaard; no antagonism leveling as in Hegel; no rationalisation, justification as in F.Hacker; no guilty feelings from some childhood catechism; no elevation through pain as in F. Nietzsche; no critical loss of senses as in Kant; no soothing path as in the Sidharta walks; no pleasure as in Hedon; no truth, no sophisms as before and after Epicure; not even the satisfaction of being 'macho' as in pubs I never go; no self-reliance as in S.Mill; no living in the moment as J.P.Sartre; no libertarian as in S. de Beauvoir, or happy not to follow the Talon laws, or not to be sure as in B.Russel; no looking down as in any middle class educated person. Silence as power: probably I did that, and was this the reason of the attack that caught me completely off-guard? And I could go forever… my favourite being 'L'Homme Dominé' by Albert Memi. I will never know.